happy holidays

I never knew why the Holidays created such depression in people. For me they have always been a time of supreme bliss, a time to share with loved ones, to celebrate all that is good in the world. Now I understand. The reason for the depression is not having loved ones around with whom to celebrate. For three days I felt this. It is a crippling, debilitating pain that turns everything gray and makes breathing the biggest task of the day. Now, I tend to learn things about myself by observing my actions, and I watched as I slept too long and then did nothing but read all day. When the phone rang I raced haphazardly toward it. I crashed into walls in my enthusiasm to reach someone, to be reached. Then I got an email inviting me to thanksgiving dinner with my family. It will be enough time before work that I can go. My day turned into rainbows and artichoke hearts. I watched a chic-flick without tears. I still race for the phone, but I don't think I'll ever outgrow that.